Lost in Translation – What in the World is a Peduncle???

peduncle1

If I had a dollar for the number of times I wanted to know how to make a peduncle… (I would have zero dollars.)***

I was once fluent in conversational Spanish, but it’s been years since I needed to speak it regularly.  Consequently I pop over to Google and use their translator every now and then.  I was reminded today why that was comically dangerous to do after reading an instructional booklet from a box of modelling clay that I purchased for my daughter.  In case you were seeking best practices for modelling clay usage, look elsewhere.  If you were wondering where to find proof that computers don’t have it all figured out yet, here you go.  I wanted to list my favorites, but I found myself laughing at all of them.  Maybe # 6.  Or # 1.  Or # 8.  Honestly I don’t know.  They are each epic in their own way.

clay1

clay2

Side note on # 8 above – I was disappointed to read that my child could not make an actual ashtray but was relieved to confirm that she could make something that had the appearance of an ashtray.  I guess her dreams won’t be entirely shattered.

chicken1

I have to give them full credit on the example above.  This really is the cutest little cock I’ve ever seen.

Stop.  It.  Now.

At this point I am considering looking up the specific manufacturer online just so I can find out what else they sell that might come with an instruction manual.  We could cancel our cable and sit around reading these for entertainment instead.  This pack of clay may be the best $10 I ever spent in my life – 14 pages of pure global economy gold.

***Per Google – pe·dun·cle (noun) – the stalk bearing a flower or fruit, or the main stalk of an inflorescence******

******I don’t even understand that in actual English.

Hasta luego.  Joanna

This post is dedicated to my soul sister Kirsten – my favorite grammar nerd.  You are the first person I wanted to send this post to.  I also enjoyed ending that last sentence with the word “to” just for the sake of messing with you.  😉

60 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. foodzesty
    Aug 01, 2017 @ 17:32:47

    hahahahaha Google Translate…When i need something translated from English to Dutch that is when I am on the floor laughing!! If you haven’t seen the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon and Idris Elba where they are singing songs that were google translated YOU MUST I could not stop laughing Joooooo!!!!

    Reply

  2. James J. Cudney IV
    Aug 01, 2017 @ 20:27:57

    Too many funny things in here to even try to bring them up. And I feel awful because I acted like a 13 year old boy when you said cock. How awful am I?
    Incidentally, peduncle is my new favorite word… when you break it down PED UNCLE… as in walking uncle! LOL

    Reply

    • MoJo
      Aug 01, 2017 @ 21:30:56

      The whole thing was so over the top. I have it in my desk now just so I can look at it when I’m bummed. My sister said “no good can come from using the word cock on any kid toy advertising EVER.” It made me laugh, too. I couldn’t help making the joke in there. It was just so over the top and the instructions – I mean seiously – who wrote these? Google is failing the planet if this is when we are on the translation front. Then again, it was awesome so maybe I should put this in the solid win category!

      Reply

      • James J. Cudney IV
        Aug 01, 2017 @ 21:34:03

        Sounds like a win. Maybe that friend of Google’s wrote it. What’s her name… Alexa?

      • MoJo
        Aug 01, 2017 @ 22:07:03

        I love Alexa. She hoses stuff up constantly, but we call her Echo in our house. I have a firm rule about being the main bossy woman announcing things here. ***there are two miniature female exceptions to the rule here though, but both have legs and 50% of my genes

      • James J. Cudney IV
        Aug 01, 2017 @ 22:44:40

        those seem like good exceptions. Besides there’s no unplug switch there… with Alexa / Echo, you can turn her off whenever you want!

      • MoJo
        Aug 01, 2017 @ 22:51:14

        Good luck with that! (me saying that to my husband!)

    • MoJo
      Aug 01, 2017 @ 21:31:38

      And yes – peduncle??? Wtf??? I wasn’t sure if it was a real word!

      Reply

  3. Trackback: 365 Challenge: Day 143 – Jumper « This Is My Truth Now
  4. riffatwajidblogs
    Aug 01, 2017 @ 23:18:25

    Hello friend

    Reply

  5. Jan
    Aug 02, 2017 @ 07:07:56

    Not just Spanish … On a recent bank statement I found the following translations: Spanish, Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean, Tagalog, Russian, Arabic, French/Haitian Creole, French, Polish, Portuguese, Italian, Japanese, German, and Persian-Farsi. Be glad your directions weren’t in Persian-Farsi !!!??? Cute post, as always. Jan

    Reply

  6. Jan
    Aug 02, 2017 @ 08:09:14

    I have to share the description of a Chipping Sparrow on this site: https://throughopenlens.com/2017/08/01/next-time-i-am-wearing-green/#like-3746

    It shows the loveliness of our native language. It is worth a look. I promise. Jan

    Reply

    • MoJo
      Aug 02, 2017 @ 19:37:39

      I accidentally blew up my site today so I apologize for taking forever to respond! It’s still in semi-blow up mode so this may be the way it is for a couple of days. Anyhoo I looooved that site! Beautiful share. I’m so glad that you sent that to me! Thank you so very much Jan!

      Reply

  7. misifusa
    Aug 02, 2017 @ 08:40:42

    Cutest cock you’ve ever seen…made me giggle! LOL

    Reply

  8. Kip Walkin
    Aug 02, 2017 @ 11:16:47

    This was some fun read. I just kept on laughing. Made my day lighter.😄😄😄😄

    Reply

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